screw you doc, i'm waking up!

Jesus God!  What the hell happened to Seattle?  Snow in No-freaking-vember?  Insanity!

All day long, people had been spouting off that we’d be getting two inches of snow, but by 4:45, nothing had materialized, so I laughed and mocked and decried the National Weather Service.  Right before I headed out of the office for the day, I looked out the window to the North and saw the biggest, blackest, most portentous cloud, like hell was heading our way—I was fully prepared to reap the whirlwind.  I would have taken a picture, but, frankly, I was afraid to anger it.

I’ve long held that wind on a  rainy day is the worst weather combination, but apparently, I was wrong.  Dead wrong.  When 30 mph winds blow snow in your face, you know that it does?  It HURTS.  You know what hurts worse than snow?  HAIL.  BY the time I got home, every exposed centimeter of my body was red and pissed the hell off.  Hail is not fun.  Hail is a friggin’ jerk.  And you know who’s a total asshole?  My front steps, or more appropriately, the sheet of ice covering my front steps this morning.  I narrowly avoided a painful death, managing only to sustain a bruised and swollen foot.  Pretty, huh?

I limped my way to work and would have been in poor spirits indeed, had I not passed by this car, covered in snow drifts and lovingly decorated by passers-by:

I dare  you not to laugh.

Comments

[christopher]

heh. cock.

[Amy]

"Hail is a friggin' jerk."

Why, did he put itching powder in Sam's jockeys?

[ahe]

Oh, Amy, the sad part is that line originally said "Hail is a freaking jerk" and then I *changed* it so it would echo Sam's like in Hell House. I have problems.

[Kulia]

I fell once in REI when I was preggers - only 7 weeks then. I went to the ER all first-time-Mommy worried about Maya and got to peek at her on ultrasound, almost worth the pain of the fall.

[Kathy]

your foot looks horrible! Where is your sock? huh? And ballet slippers? Hello! You should have some sort of boot that can grip the ice better than those flats!!!!

[ahe]

Dude, the flats I am wearing actually have traction--the squiggly stuff and everything--on the bottom and are my sturdiest shoes. Anyway, I would have slipped on those steps wearing any shoes that didn't have freaking cleats on them. Seriously. Solid. Ice.

[Annie]

You have bony feet!

Also, I was so annoyed with the weather yesterday to. I think you made it home befoer it got really bad, though. It was a blizzard!

[ahe]

*YOU* have bony feet!

[Dr. Danskin]

HA ha! Cock cars make any day better! Dude - I can't believe it snowed in Seattle before it snowed in DC! I call bullshit! But hail IS a friggin' jerk unless you're inside and can feel good about not being the poor bastard running through it to safety.

[jordan]

there is something really satisying about the phrase "friggin' jerk." i can't believe the snow either. pacific northwest, people!

<i>Cock cars make any day better!</i>

truer words have never been spoken.

[jordan]

also, is that just poor lighting or do you have pale, zombie feet?

[Baxter]

I like that there are TWO kinds of cock illustrated, so that it can be all things to all people.

[ahe]

I loved that they went to that level of detail. Though I like to imagine that each part was done by three seperate people--the first one wrote COCK, the second added the rooster and the third added the penis. That scene played out well in my head. Giggles!

Also, jordan, you're a friggin' jerk! t's just the lighting. *Or is it?*